An exceeding fine party

Sure I am particular pleas’d to see Sandy the next morn, so that I may open to him this troubling matter that has been communicat’d by Mrs D- K-.

He comes in looking a little shadow-ey’d.

I pour him some coffee and desire him to help himself to parkin.

He drinks several cups of coffee and looks more wakefull.

I apprehend, says I, that Milord is return’d to Town.

Indeed, says Sandy and then gives me a dour Calvinistickal glare. I see not, he says, what a silly creature finds so amuzing.

O, indeed I am a light-mind’d featherwit, says I. But sure, I have some heavyer matter to disclose to you.

I tell him of what Mrs D- K- said to me, and he frowns. Sure there were a deal of papers she hand’d over concerning her late husband’s affairs, that were in most extreme disarray – he was not a business-like fellow. I did not scrutinize everything – was about finding anything relating to his financial situation, and passt over anything that lookt not like that, but perchance I should go and examine the papers again.

Would he have kept any matter relating to suspicions of sedition in writing? says I. I suppose he might have employ’d some cypher.

Sandy sighs and says, did I not remark that he was unbusiness-like? And one may very much doubt that he ever manifest’d that discretion that is so admirable a quality of our dear sibyl’s.

Flattering weasel! says I, but I daresay you have the right of it.

But I am also given to wonder, he goes on, whether the poet goes drop hints that there was somewhat unnatural about Mr D- K-'s demise –

Sure, says I, doubtless someone went about to bribe the local surgeon, the crowner, the jury, into silence, despite his wounds bleeding and crying for vengeance. Did I put that into a novel 'twould be consider’d a deal more improbable than ghosts or monsters or love-potions.

But, says Sandy, I do not think one would need to invoke bribery. Those fellows were all country neighbours of Sir V- P-, that is of a long-establisht gentry family in those parts, and when one considers that his guests includ’d a Duke among others of high rank, may be suppos’d that they were all entire over-aw’d and eager to be persuad’d.

Oh, says I, ‘tis possible. But sure I would suppose that given that all had heard of the quarrel 'twixt Mr W- Y- and Mr D- K-, and there were those went look at him slantwise, for receiving poetick inspiration is not the soundest of alibis, that the poet would not go about to raise suspicions that there was aught unnatural in the matter.

Hmmm, responds Sandy, does he suppose he may throw mud but remain spotless himself, I confide that the laughing-gas has a most deleterious effect upon his ratiocinative capacities, which were never remarkable to begin with.

La, says I, Mr MacD-, you use such exceeding long words, sure a silly creature such as I is quite bewilder’d.

Hah! does he go about describing Lady B- as a pretty featherwit I daresay there are those will be brought to considerable doubts about his judgement.

Say you so!

Come, dear C-, if one such as Lord A- can describe you as a prudent lady that knows what’s what -

What? I cry.

O, indeed he sees that you would make a fellow a most excellent wife, but indeed, 'tis not that he goes make suit to you, 'tis that he hopes you will put him in the way of a lady with similar merits and a very large portion, and would greatly desire that I could make this known to G-. For he is very put about that G- supposes he is about cutting him out with the exquisite Lady B-. Sure he would not dare.

I laugh somewhat immoderate. Why, says I at length when I am capable of speech once more, indeed I think I go about to find a young lady that will entire meet his requirements.

I hope, dearest C-, that you are not about making a monster, animat’d by lightning, that would be all that Lord A- desires –

O, do not teaze! There are young ladies in Society that greatly admire a fellow that is so good-looking and so exceeding well-dresst and such a not’d sportsman.

Sandy begins smile and says, sure he confides that he has the original of such imitations.

Indeed you do, my dear, and a very pretty thing 'tis.

He blushes somewhat and endeavours look severe.

And do you go to this party at Sir B- W-'s the e’en?

I anticipate the R- House party will be there in force!

And Miss N-?

I confide that Mr L- goes take her out – the theatre, I apprehend. There is an excellent fellow that runs a very fine paper, that becomes quite widely read beyond its locality, his leaders much not’d &C.

And a prudent businessman as well, says I, knows what will sell papers and entice advertizers.

Delightfull tho’ 'tis to converse thus with the sibyl - sure when you were at R- House there would always be one coming desiring you for some matter of toy theatres or tigers or wombatts or some such – there are matters I must be about.

Indeed, I think after he had gone, 'tis most agreeable to converse freely tete-à-tete without such interruptions, even do I greatly love being one of the family. But I also greatly enjoy being my own woman, for 'tis a habit I have been in these many years.

I go write upon my novel of wreckers, that now also deals of a horrid sea-monster. 'Tis most exceeding agreeable work, for I find the words quite flow at present, as they do not always do.

When I go dress to go out, Docket chides me for my inky condition, sure she knows not how I contrive to go spatter myself so wholesale. I apologise very meek for the trouble this gives.

But in due course I am finely array’d and in no wise resemble an inky schoolboy.

I have a fine box of hot coals in my carriage to keep me warm, tho’ 'tis no great journey to Sir B- W-'s.

Indeed, 'tis not quite the same as the fine parties at the S-s’ modest house, but when I come into the reception room I see that 'tis our own usual set, including the S-s themselves, that spend a few days staying at M- House, their own little house being let while they stay in Hampshire, so that they may undertake some necessary business in Town. It is indeed most exceeding agreeable to see Martha and Jacob S- and to ask after little Deborah and to exchange news and express concern for Lady J- and remark upon the Admiral’s fine devotion &C.

Sir C- F-, that is an old friend of Sir B- W- from his fribble days, has been invit’d, and goes twit his friend very much in the spirit of here you may see Benedick, the marry’d man. Sir B- W- takes this with entire good humour, and tells Sir C- F- that he should go marry a clever woman himself, 'tis quite the finest thing, and looks exceeding doating at Susannah.

He has brought with him Lord U- and Lord Geoffrey from M- House – I say to them I hope Lord Edward is not ill and they say no, Eddy said 'twould look somewhat particular did we all come in a pack, and he would stay with Mama and read to her.

That is exceeding good of him, says I.

Lord U- smiles somewhat and says he dares says Eddy will take the opportunity of being alone with Mama to confide about the very fine lady Sebastian K- introduc’d him to in Prague - o, really, Geoff, there is no need to pull that Evangelickal face, she was an entire respectable young lady in one of the families he had an introduction to. But I hazard 'Bastian will be here this e’en?

I am like to think so, says I. I see that His and Her Grace are not yet arriv’d, perchance he comes with 'em.

Sure I might go feel somewhat put about when Lord Geoffrey’s attention is quite withdrawn from myself and he gazes over to the door of the reception room, where the R- House party come in.

Oho, says Lord U- to me in an undertone, is that the fam’d MacD-?

Red hair, spectacles? says I. With Lord G- R- and Mr and Mrs F-?

Is that not Viscount R-? says Lord U-.

Indeed that is his correct style, says I, but we first made our acquaintance before his father’s death, when he was still Lord G- R-, and sure I got into the habit.

Lord U- looks at me and I apprehend that he has heard somewhat of the extreme discreet liaison there has been this entire age 'twixt Milord and myself. You are old friends, then, he says.

O, most extreme old friends! I cry. But do you let me make introductions.

As I am about this, enter Lord and Lady D- and Miss S-, follow’d extreme shortly by Biffle, Little V, and her brother. I am kept exceeding busy about introductions, greetings, exchange of news, &C.

I am very prepossesst at Lord U-'s talking to my dear love Eliza about how much his sister, Lady Louisa, enjoy’d the party at R- House for the younger set. ('Tis extreme gratifying to hear.) His Mama does not make calls – Eliza indicates that she is appriz’d of the Countess’s invalid condition – but did Mrs F- ever call at N- House he is sure she would be admitt’d. Eliza declares that Lady Louisa is a fine young woman and quite the greatest favourite with her own dear hoyden Bess.

While they are in conversation come the V-s, along with the Marquess, who observes Jacob S- in the company and goes greet him very civil.

Tho’ sure I miss the dearest T-s that were with us last year, 'tis still an exceeding fine party.