Miss A- is no longer a little scar’d rabbit

'Tis most extreme pleasing to go to the theatre and to observe Lady D- and Miss S- in the M- box: Lady D- can scarce contain her excitement.

The play is nothing remarkable, and to those that attend most regular, Miss R- must appear not quite in best form, and, after hearing Mr J-'s complaints upon actresses, I cannot help but surmize why.

Sure I must go and sound out this matter of Miss A- going to Harrogate and Miss R-'s queasy turns. Indeed I am a little surpriz’d that I have not seen the dear rogue for some days.

The next forenoon I am about my correspondence while I continue to puzzle over these theatre dramas.

Hector comes show in Sandy; shortly after comes Celeste with coffee and scones.

How now, o bello scozzese, says I, sure I am particular glad to see you the morn, have a question I should like to ask of you.

Sandy blinks a little: I perceive that he has not yet got coffee-cup in hand, so I pour him some and wait for it to make its effect.

Ask on, o wisest of silly creatures!

Do you know aught of the Marquess of O-, that was formerly Lord Anthony A-, fam’d explorer and virtuoso of botany?

Sandy gives a great mirthfull smile and says, indeed he does, has heard a deal concerning the fellow among sets he frequents.

O, says I, is he perchance of the brotherhood?

What! not to my knowledge: the fellow is, or has been, shall we say an adherent of the Cause? His explorations took him to a deal of parts of the globe where there were struggles against tyranny, and sure, an eccentrique English Milord that hunts flowers - who would suspect such a one of revolutionary leanings?

Ah, says I, 'twould explain why he desires an introduction to Milord and his fine politickal set.

Why, says Sandy, 'tis most encouraging to hear. But does the fellow go make suit to the lovely widow’d Marchioness?

I confide not, says I, for I am given to apprehend that he has been offer’d a matrimonial alliance.

That is extreme expeditious, remarks Sandy, the fellow can scarce be out of mourning for his late brother. But indeed, I daresay there are those anxious to bring about such an advantageous match –

Will or nil the propos’d bride, says I.

Oh. Sure, dearest C-, I have heard you quite sermonize upon the topick that there are fellows that preach liberty and freedom most liberal, and still have very benight’d notions concerning the place of woman.

Entirely so, says I. Sure I was not wearing my very stylish red cap of liberty when I met His Lordship. He show’d extreme civil, desires to convoke with Roberts upon some botanickal matter as well as an introduction to Milord; is well report’d upon by Jacob S- and the V-s; but, indeed, if he concedes to this marriage as entire in order and the done thing, I shall not be able to bring myself to like him.

One may suppose, says Sandy very thoughtfull, that does a fellow go offer another fellow his eligible female relative – for I daresay the lady is comely, youthfull, and of high birth? – I nod – 'twould be a somewhat difficult matter to refuse outright.

Hmm, says I, you may be right. And one that has just succeed’d as Marquess can hardly make your fine declaration about a man of spirit’s dislike to marrying for advantage.

Are you entire sure, dearest C-, that you do not propose writing a novel of Society life?

Fie upon it, says I, leave me to my ghosts and monsters and horrid devices. Why do not you attempt such a matter?

We look at one another with great affection.

Well, says he, I will go tell G- that the fellow desires his acquaintance and has some inclination towards our coterie. And I will mention the matter to Roberts. He pauses and adds, Do you hear from Lady J-? there are a couple of new works upon classickal subjects that I should like to send her to have her opinion of, is she recover’d enough to give time to her studies.

Sure, says I, I confide that she would be extreme gratefull. Might distract her from running around about dairy-matters, for Martha reports her still somewhat pull’d down in bodily health.

We part with very amiable feeling, and I return to my correspondence.

Comes in Dorcas, and says Dolly Mutton has no particular knowledge of the gentleman I askt about, but will go ask about. Also she has taken the liberty of arranging to take Prue to have her eyes examin’d.

Excellent, says I. Is all else well within the household?

Dorcas says that she confides so, but that Nell, that should be about her duties in the mews cottage, finds a deal of occasion to come around gaping upon Timothy.

Well, says I, he is becoming a well-set-up young fellow, and I apprehend that Hector has been about warning him of the beguilements of women.

In the afternoon I desire Ajax to take me to Miss A-'s lodgings, for I greatly wish to discover what this matter is of her going to Harrogate. However, Rose informs me that Miss A- is gone to the theatre, so I proceed there.

When I arrive at Miss A-'s dressing-room, I discover her there, along with Miss R-, that is awash with tears and sobbing mightily.

How now, says I, perchance I come at an unsuitable time?

O no, cries Miss A-, I have just been exhorting Miss R- to open the matter to you, that is always such a wise mentor.

O, you flatterer! says I, seating myself. Might we have some tea, 'tis very soothing?

Miss A- goes send Maggy, that grumbles the while, to fetch tea.

So, says I, when we all have what the poet has justly called the cup that chears, what’s ado, my dears?

Miss R- blows her nose and says that she goes with child.

Well, my dear, is the matter not too advanc’d there is a fine midwife I could recommend to you, that I confide will know of means of taking it off; but if you do not wish to take that road, sure I daresay Danvers D- would do all that is proper, provide for your lying-in, acknowledge the child and make suitable provision –

Miss R- breaks out in tears again and says, he has start’d to talk about marriage. Says his mama has been pestering him for grandchildren this age, and he has never encounter’d a woman he likes as much as me, 'twould be a most excellent thing.

But, she says, in a great wail, I should have to give up the stage.

Indeed, thinks I, sure there are marry’d actresses, but they are those that have marry’d within the profession; Danvers D- is of a different station and 'twould be consider’d in very poor ton for his wife to be upon the stage.

'Twould be a great loss to the theatre, says Miss A-, did Miss R- go marry and quit it.

Sure I quite see that: 'tis her vocation, just as 'tis Miss A-'s.

But, she goes on, sure I should not wish to hurt Danvers’ feelings, and 'tis a kind and honourable offer.

I say indeed 'tis a very knott’d business, but I will go consider upon it.

Also, she goes on, who would make a home for my uncle did I go marry?

She is at length got out of the dressing-room and goes splash water upon her face and, I daresay, make little Puggsiekins the confidante of her troubles.

Well, says I, turning to Miss A-. 'Tis a brangle and no mistake. Sure she is by no means ineligible as a wife: comes of genteel folk, I apprehend, and I daresay would show well in Society. And Danvers D- may be exceeding wealthy, but he is by no means of aristocratick rank himself. Mrs D- already quite doats upon Miss R-.

But, my dear, what is this business of going play in Harrogate? I saw Mr J- 'tother day very put about in the matter.

Miss A- folds her hands in her lap and looks at me a little sideways. Why, says she, I had to find some stratagem to persuade Lady J- to go take the waters instead of delaying her recovery by getting up before dawn to milk cows &C. So, I wrote to friends at Harrogate, that are quite delight’d to get a crack Town actress for a short season; and then told Lady J- that I was going there, would she not come join me, and get the benefit of the waters while we were there?

And, she says, she has quite conced’d that 'tis a most excellent plan – I think she fear’d becoming melancholick did she go there alone, for I daresay she would not consider the society there up to her mark. But am I there, 'twould be an entire different matter.

My dear! says I, what a fine stratagem! Sure we will yet find you writing plays as well as acting in 'em. And indeed, I think 'twill greatly benefit her to go take the waters and not be anywhere where she feels oblig’d to bustle about in her usual fashion. I confide that the Admiral would greatly applaud your course of action.

What a dear fellow he is, says Miss A- with a slight blush. Would never think of coming 'twixt Lady J- and myself, 'tis surely a very rare thing.

The finest of fellows, says I. But will this fine plan not cause problems with Mr J- and the rest of the company?

She gives a little smile and says, she thinks it may make them not take her for grant’d.

Dear rogue, says I with a smile, sure you are no longer that little scar’d rabbit that was Mr P-'s protegée.