I do not think my household would care to go to Africa

Making calls may be somewhat in the nature of drudgery, but there are some calls that are agreeable to make and where 'tis no longer a matter of staying the precise proper time and then rising to leave.

I have become wont to leaving calling upon Lady N- to the end of my rounds, so that I may not feel oblig’d to be up and gone very expeditious, for I find a great liking for the lady and also fear that, because she may not be about making calls herself, there are many neglect to call upon her. 'Tis quite entire their loss.

So I call upon her one afternoon and find her about working upon Lord N-'s hortus siccus, which she puts to one side as I am shown in, I apprehend, with a certain amount of relief. O, Lady B-, what a pleasure to see you! Sure you are looking exceeding well.

I remark that there is a pleasing autumnal crispness to the air today, very agreeable.

I go sit down and Selina shows me markt favour by jumping into my lap and purring.

Lady N- sighs a little and says 'twould be agreeable to be driven out into the air is the weather fine, from time to time, was there a carriage that would not jounce her around.

Why, says I, do you not find that the art of carriage-making has reacht a fine state in this present age? One may travel in quite remarkable comfort.

Indeed, she says with a smile, my girls came telling me of how exceeding comfortable Lady B-'s fine carriage was. But sure, 'twould be quite extravagant to have a carriage made just so that I might drive out very occasional.

(I consider the amounts that Lord N- must disburse upon rare plants, fine volumes of botanickal drawings, upkeep of hothouses &C: but I confide that husbands will be whimsickal and unless a wife opens the matter herself, 'tis good ton not to remark upon these whims.)

Perchance, says I, you might care to drive out a little in my carriage some day?

That would be entire delightfull, she says, sure I have not driven in the Park this age, is it still the same?

Indeed it does not change much, still the gathering place for Society to see and be seen.

She says, but she has very fine news, has lately had a letter from U- and Edward – that are upon their Grand Tour, U-'s godfather kindly acts their bear-leader - that they confide that they will be home by Christmas, which will be the very delightfullest thing. And if they are in Town once the Season is begun, I daresay we may persuade Lord N- to give a fine ball here, as Nan and Em have begg’d me.

I ask how they get on on their Grand Tour, which she tells me at length where they have been and what they have seen, and then says, o, and lately in Prague they met Her Grace of M-'s brother, that they took to most extremely – sure one must suppose that her brother is quite as charming as she is?

Why, says I, they are twins, and their mama nam’d them Viola and Sebastian because she had lately seen Twelfth Night at the theatre – tho’ sure I do not think they could change places or be mistook for one another as in the play. But he is a very well-conduct’d responsible young fellow – I hope he goes kick up his heels a little, for he was a very dutyfull son in acting his father’s deputy in business, quite the old head upon young shoulders.

Entirely the kind of friend one would want for them, she says. Just as Her Grace is such a good influence upon the girls. And sure I was a little concern’d when Geoff turn’d up with Mr MacD-, that he had met quite entire by chance at W- Hall, but one hears that he is everywhere well-spoke of, and he has encourag’d Geoff to read and think - there was some talk of sending him to Oxford but he had no inclination to it, but 'tis most agreeable now to see how he applies himself to his books. And sure there are far worse amuzements for a young man than amateur theatrickals -

She pauses for a moment and says that she did take some little concern about Miss A- coming instruct them, but indeed, she has an entire air of refinement, and sure one can quite see why such a discriminating lady as His Grace of M-'s sister is her patron.

O, the finest of creatures! says I. Most extreme dedicat’d to her art.

The girls are quite entire in love with her, but I confide that Geoff’s heart is still given to the lovely Lady B-: sure you are most exemplary patient with him.

Why, says I, I confide that any faults he may have at present are entirely those of youth in generality, and that he is like to show impressive when he comes to older years.

'Tis most beneficial to him, she remarks, that his elder brothers are away, for altho’ they are very fond of him, are apt to treat him as very much their little brother.

'Tis also quite entirely beneficial to the girls that they are now in a good younger set: Laetitia was always one to be suspecting encroachment and telling them they should hold themselves high. Lou also goes make friends – is quite enamour’d of Miss F-.

I laugh and say that I fancy the thing goes both ways.

O, indeed, those girlish friendships!

We smile at one another, tho’ I confide that my own girlish friendship with my dear Abby is a deal of a way from her own memories.

Alas, says I, 'tis most agreeable to sit here and gossip, but I am bidden to a dinner-party at P- House and must go prepare myself.

Sure indeed 'tis somewhat of a puzzle as to how I should array myself for a dinner-party with Lord D-, that is both suit’d to such an occasion and will not offend his sensibilities, but I confide that Docket has the matter entirely in hand.

So I am dresst somewhat quiet but exceeding stylish, with a very becoming cap, and my pearls. I can suppose no objection at all.

I find that the guests include Milord, that is similarly dresst in sober yet stylish fashion, and several that I apprehend to be part of Lord D-'s Evangelickal set.

Lady D- and Agnes S- are array’d so extreme sober that they might cause remark in a Quaker meeting, and Lady D- looks a little nervous, tho’ perchance this is an effect of her condition.

I am taken in by Lord D-, which is quite entire proper according to the Order of Precedence, but I see some slantwise glances from the Evangelickals. His lady is taken in by Milord, that is also the proper thing, and I am sure he will be kind to her shyness.

There is an exceeding fine first course laid – I collect that Agnes S- remarkt that Lord D- had no objections to the pleasures of the table - and I compliment him upon his cook.

He says that indeed, their kitchen is very well, and goes on to wonder whether His Lordship’s cook might communicate some of the receipts for those very fine Hindoo dishes that were serv’d at the tiffin-party.

I say that I confide that she would be quite delight’d, or indeed, my own cook has the same receipts, having learnt her craft under Seraphine.

He then goes talk about an enterprize to go settle Africkans that at present reside in England in Africa, where 'tis hop’d that they will evangelize and civilize the native population.

Why, says I, as you know my household is mostly of Africkan descent, but sure their families have liv’d in Town these several generations, they feel themselves entirely freeborn English. (For I fancy that they would desire to go live in the Africkan jungles as much as I should desire to go live Herr P-'s ideal community in the American wilderness, viz: not in the least.)

'Tis very creditable in them, he says, but would it not be a most excellent thing for them to go bring the notions of civilization to those parts?

Sure, says I, I know nothing of Africa, but for reports from friends that have visit’d the Cape, but the late General Y-, of the Madras service, would opine that one could not term the Hindoos unciviliz'd, tho’ their ways are so different from ours.

Lord D- commences to grumble about the Hon Company’s dislike to missionaries, 'tis a most shocking thing. There is that vast land, mir’d in heathen superstition, and they will go be entire indifferent to religion, for fear 'twill interfere with trade.

(I am like to suppose that 'tis no time to remark what fine devot’d creatures were General Y-'s Hindoo servants, that serv’d him most excellent well, even leaving their native land to do so.)

'Tis most agreeable when the first course is remov’d, and he goes talk to the lady on his other side.

I go turn with a smile to the fellow that sits at my other side, that looks at me with an expression that sure I know well, which is that of a fellow that is determin’d that he will not be beguil’d by my seductive wiles.

I therefore go talk to him about the optickal dispensary, taking Mr N- as my model.

'Tis somewhat of a relief when Lady D- is seen to bite her lip, recall to herself that she must withdraw the ladies, and rise to her feet to do so.

Tho’ in the drawing-room 'tis most exceeding noticeable that several of the ladies keep almost the entire breadth of the room away from me as if I had some contagious fever.